Today I finally got my new routine from the trainer. There was a mix up on signing up for a time, so I showed up, thinking I had a time with him and he wasn't planning on me. However, he had my new routine completed, so he took about 5-10 minutes to run me through what he wanted me to do. The main difference was in cardio. All my weights were the same… just higher sets and less reps. So, I was okay with that. Cardio I know. So, 5-10 minutes explaining what he wanted me to do was fine. If there would have been changes with the weights, then I would have needed more time.
So, I followed his new routine for today. It definitely served to get my heart rate up! I have been struggling lately with getting my heart rate up. I don't know if my resting heart rate has slowed down a bit, so it's going to take me a bit more effort than it used to to get my heart rate up… but it's been a struggle. However today… yeah. Not a problem! And the calorie burn was through the roof. This was the first time I'd seen a burn that high.
However, today also tested my determination. Holy stink. Have I ever told you that lateral raises are the very DEVIL? They kick my trash. And he changed up how I did them today. So, the trash kicking level was intensified. And like I mentioned, he upped my sets. I thought my arms were going to fall off. I kinda wished they would! It was during this time that I had to just force myself to keep going. The thought "I can't do this" kept popping up repeatedly. I had to pull out all my positive thinking mantras.
I finally got to the point where I said to myself "Can I is irrelevant. The question is will I?" Then I realized that wasn't the question either. I would. I will. I did. What I then started saying is "The question is not whether I can. The question is not whether I will. The only question is how much is it going to hurt?"
That thought carried me through the cardio boxes as well (cardio boxes= think the steps used in circuit training). The cardio boxes were the new thing he added to my routine. The only time the trainer put for cardio boxes was "as many as possible." He suggested I start with at least 4. I made it through 7. That was where the heart rate finally got up! And I had to pull out my positive thinking mantras for those as well. After the boxes, I got back on the treadmill for 20 minutes to finish off. I upped my speed and incline just slightly. After the boxes, it was a breeze!
But it was a good feeling finishing that workout. I felt accomplished and kinda proud of myself. I loved my new mantra.
The question is not "can I." The question is not "will I." The only question is "how bad is it going to hurt?"
Tuesday, September 30, 2014
Saturday, September 20, 2014
A Reminder
When I first started this blog… I talked about what GOAL meant to me. There is a reason it's all capitalized. Because in my world… GOAL is an acronym. It stands for "Get Out And Live."
GOAL Inspired Living… is living a life where I choose to Get Out and Live!
This comes up as a result of a few posts I've seen recently on MFP.
I am not a goal-oriented person. And I'm proud of that. "Goal" is a nasty four-letter word in my world. I attempt to eliminate from my vocabulary as much as possible. I get a little frustrated by people who try to insist that I use "goals" in my life. I try to explain what goal means to me and why I don't like it. Some people then try to define goal for me and explain why it is a positive word and why I should use it. IT DOESN'T WORK FOR ME! (And yes, in this context… using all caps is meant to signify yelling. Because apparently reasonable and intelligent conversation doesn't get through to some people. I'm looking at you G.S.)
In fact… in my attempt to eliminate "goal" from my vocabulary… I'm going to change the phrase "goal weight" to "maintenance weight."
But here is why I do not like the word goal and why I'm trying to eliminate it from my vocabulary. To me… goal is an end point. It is something you work towards and when you reach it… you're done. Mission accomplished. It's kinda like wanting to get my bachelors degree. I worked toward that. And then I accomplished it. And once I did… I didn't keep working on it! That wouldn't make sense. I already had it! And that is what goal means to me.
Except when it comes to weight loss… if I do that… then I would end up gaining the weight back. A goal is not a lifestyle change. It is something you work for… then when you accomplish it… you pat yourself on the back for a job well done and you move on to something else.
So, I have chosen not to be goal-oriented. I chose to be process-oriented. I focus on the kind of life I want to have… and I live accordingly. In this area that includes eating healthier and less. It includes getting in regular exercise. If the scale goes down… that's great. Don't get me wrong… I love to see the scale go down. But if it doesn't (it didn't today), I don't get down on myself. I don't feel like a failure. And I don't consider throwing in the towel "'cuz it's not working anyway." I simply keep going. Because the important thing is that I continue doing those things that will allow me to have the life I want. My week is a success if I continually do those things that I need to (eat right… exercise). My week is not a success if I lose weight.
And therefore… when I get down to my "maintenance weight" (ooh, I really like that term!) it doesn't mean mission accomplished and move on. It means I keep going with what I need to do have the life I want.
A quote I found that really speaks to me says it well...
If you focus on results, you'll never change.
If you focus on change, you'll get results.
This works for other areas of my life too. But that is another topic for a different venue.
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
Random Current Events
In interest of keeping things current…. the most recent weigh in was 309… aka 72 pounds down. Very exciting stuff. The next milestone to get below 300 is within tasting reach (meaning so close I can almost taste it!). Heck…even 100 pounds down (1/2 way there!) is getting within tasting reach!
I am due for another re-design with the trainer at the gym any day. I need to get an appointment set up.
Did I tell you about my latest great idea to introduce intervals into my cardio routine? Yeah. I got antsy to "up the game" so to speak on my cardio routine. So, one day I upped my walking speed from 3.3 to 3.5 and added in intervals of 5.0. You know… because I'm a masochist! I made it through two 30-second bursts of 5.0 before I felt like I was going to die. And I did the rest of my time at 3.5. But I broke that barrier into jogging (although to me it felt like an outright sprint!). And chances are good that my trainer will want me to start doing intervals once I meet with him for the redesign. And I've got it into my head to run a 5k within the next year. I actually want to do two of them. One in the spring (the annual 5k that my church hosts) and one on the 4th of July in my hometown. Now as mentioned, the first one of those isn't on the calendar until Spring… and probably later spring at that. So, I've got some time to prepare myself for that… but I figure interval training will be good for me in that process.
I've been trying to recruit my sisters to run it with me but that's been a big fat fail. Without exception, I've gotten a "no way. I can't run." I tried to tell them they had almost a year to prepare for it… but it's still been a no-go. However, one of my nieces has agreed to do it with me. If my brother and my other niece will do it again (they both did it this past July), then there should be 4 of us for that. That is an acceptable showing.
This past weekend I was with my family for a special event. Most of them haven't seen me in 42 pounds. I have sent pictures to my sisters… so they have an idea of where I'm at, but this is the first they've seen me. So, my weight loss was a fairly common topic of conversation throughout the weekend. On Sunday, I had an extended conversation with my brother in-law about how I was doing it.
People at work are starting to comment and ask what I am doing as well.
On MFP… it seems like people are coming out of the woodwork, having seen one of my posts on the forums… and wanting to add me as a friend because I'm inspiring to them.
It's all a little surreal. This is new territory for me. Inspiring is not a word usually used to describe me. I kinda like it… but I kinda don't know what do with it either.
I am due for another re-design with the trainer at the gym any day. I need to get an appointment set up.
Did I tell you about my latest great idea to introduce intervals into my cardio routine? Yeah. I got antsy to "up the game" so to speak on my cardio routine. So, one day I upped my walking speed from 3.3 to 3.5 and added in intervals of 5.0. You know… because I'm a masochist! I made it through two 30-second bursts of 5.0 before I felt like I was going to die. And I did the rest of my time at 3.5. But I broke that barrier into jogging (although to me it felt like an outright sprint!). And chances are good that my trainer will want me to start doing intervals once I meet with him for the redesign. And I've got it into my head to run a 5k within the next year. I actually want to do two of them. One in the spring (the annual 5k that my church hosts) and one on the 4th of July in my hometown. Now as mentioned, the first one of those isn't on the calendar until Spring… and probably later spring at that. So, I've got some time to prepare myself for that… but I figure interval training will be good for me in that process.
I've been trying to recruit my sisters to run it with me but that's been a big fat fail. Without exception, I've gotten a "no way. I can't run." I tried to tell them they had almost a year to prepare for it… but it's still been a no-go. However, one of my nieces has agreed to do it with me. If my brother and my other niece will do it again (they both did it this past July), then there should be 4 of us for that. That is an acceptable showing.
This past weekend I was with my family for a special event. Most of them haven't seen me in 42 pounds. I have sent pictures to my sisters… so they have an idea of where I'm at, but this is the first they've seen me. So, my weight loss was a fairly common topic of conversation throughout the weekend. On Sunday, I had an extended conversation with my brother in-law about how I was doing it.
People at work are starting to comment and ask what I am doing as well.
On MFP… it seems like people are coming out of the woodwork, having seen one of my posts on the forums… and wanting to add me as a friend because I'm inspiring to them.
It's all a little surreal. This is new territory for me. Inspiring is not a word usually used to describe me. I kinda like it… but I kinda don't know what do with it either.
Saturday, August 30, 2014
The 5-Week Prediction
Weigh in tonight was 317. That's 64 pounds down.
Also, as I've mentioned, I use My Fitness Pal to help me count calories. Every day, once I've completed all my entries for the day as far as food, exercise, and water, I hit this little button that says "complete entry." It will then give me a 5 week prediction of my weight based on my calorie intake/output of that day…
It reads If every day were like today… You'd weigh XXX in 5 weeks.
Then it gives a little disclaimer stating…"your projected weight loss is an estimate based on your total net calories for today. Actual results may vary." Which is an important disclaimer. Basically it's saying that theoretically, in order for that prediction to be accurate… you would have to eat the EXACT same amount of calories and burn the exact same amount of calories every day. Which is not realistic at all. But some people miss that little disclaimer. And they get upset with MFP for not giving them an accurate assessment. Or they somehow feel like a failure because they are not hitting that weight in the estimated time period. Personally, I love seeing that little prediction. It's highly motivating to me. However… once I've looked at it… I'm done. I forget it about it. It's not like I'm keeping track of those numbers every day and then comparing them to my actual weight at the designated 5 week mark. To be honest… I have no flipping clue whether or not their predictions have been accurate for me or not.
But all that being said… I got particularly excited by tonight's prediction. Tonight's prediction said that I would weigh 297 in 5 weeks. Like I said… I don't put great stock in it…. but this was the first time that my weight has been low enough that the 5 week projection put me at below 300. And that's pretty thrilling. There is something about having a 2 as the first number that feels SOOO much smaller. That feels kinda "normal" overweight rather than "freaking huge." It is a little frustrating that I've lost almost 65 pounds and I'm still well over 300. Not that I'm letting it get me down. I'm plenty happy with how things have gone so far… but it is something that's a little demoralizing. So, it feels very good to see that number as the 5 week prediction… whether it's going to end up being accurate or not.
Also, as I've mentioned, I use My Fitness Pal to help me count calories. Every day, once I've completed all my entries for the day as far as food, exercise, and water, I hit this little button that says "complete entry." It will then give me a 5 week prediction of my weight based on my calorie intake/output of that day…
It reads If every day were like today… You'd weigh XXX in 5 weeks.
Then it gives a little disclaimer stating…"your projected weight loss is an estimate based on your total net calories for today. Actual results may vary." Which is an important disclaimer. Basically it's saying that theoretically, in order for that prediction to be accurate… you would have to eat the EXACT same amount of calories and burn the exact same amount of calories every day. Which is not realistic at all. But some people miss that little disclaimer. And they get upset with MFP for not giving them an accurate assessment. Or they somehow feel like a failure because they are not hitting that weight in the estimated time period. Personally, I love seeing that little prediction. It's highly motivating to me. However… once I've looked at it… I'm done. I forget it about it. It's not like I'm keeping track of those numbers every day and then comparing them to my actual weight at the designated 5 week mark. To be honest… I have no flipping clue whether or not their predictions have been accurate for me or not.
But all that being said… I got particularly excited by tonight's prediction. Tonight's prediction said that I would weigh 297 in 5 weeks. Like I said… I don't put great stock in it…. but this was the first time that my weight has been low enough that the 5 week projection put me at below 300. And that's pretty thrilling. There is something about having a 2 as the first number that feels SOOO much smaller. That feels kinda "normal" overweight rather than "freaking huge." It is a little frustrating that I've lost almost 65 pounds and I'm still well over 300. Not that I'm letting it get me down. I'm plenty happy with how things have gone so far… but it is something that's a little demoralizing. So, it feels very good to see that number as the 5 week prediction… whether it's going to end up being accurate or not.
Saturday, August 23, 2014
Props, Apologies, and Appreciation
So, I was at the gym yesterday (Thursday). I was on my last machine for weights. I had just adjusted the seat and the weight and had sat down to start my reps when a guy that was working out on a neighboring machine came over to me.
"I just wanted to say… props for the motivation." *Holds out his hand for a fist bump* "My buddy and I are here everyday and we see people come and go. But those who keep it up and work hard… well, good job."
I thanked him. He left and we both continued with our workouts. But I have to say… that pretty much made my day. He was one of those super fit and built guys. The kind that can probably lift with their pinky finger what I struggle to bench. It's nice to know that despite my piddly light weights and moderate speed (at my fastest) walks… that someone respects the efforts I've made… even though he probably does more than that on his rest days.
So my apologies to anyone who I may have mentally judged as a "meathead" and assumed they were all full of themselves. And my thanks to that guy at the gym. I really do appreciate what you said.
"I just wanted to say… props for the motivation." *Holds out his hand for a fist bump* "My buddy and I are here everyday and we see people come and go. But those who keep it up and work hard… well, good job."
I thanked him. He left and we both continued with our workouts. But I have to say… that pretty much made my day. He was one of those super fit and built guys. The kind that can probably lift with their pinky finger what I struggle to bench. It's nice to know that despite my piddly light weights and moderate speed (at my fastest) walks… that someone respects the efforts I've made… even though he probably does more than that on his rest days.
So my apologies to anyone who I may have mentally judged as a "meathead" and assumed they were all full of themselves. And my thanks to that guy at the gym. I really do appreciate what you said.
Thursday, August 21, 2014
The One that Made Me Cry
Last night, I wore my new jeans and one of the new shirts to work. One of my co-workers commented that she could definitely tell a difference with me wearing those new clothes.
I got home and took a pic using the mirror. Then I compared it to my "before" photo taken almost exactly 4 months ago today.
And I cried.
It was the first time I've ever been able to truly see a change. A change that I really could see without chalking it up to "ahh, it may just be my own wishful thinking."
So, I put them together. To share here.
I hear on MFP that people have seen pics of themselves when they were at their heaviest weight and it made them cry. It was their wake up call. I never had that. I've always kinda hated the camera… but I never cried because of how I looked in a photo. Until I saw these two side by side. But they were happy tears.
I got home and took a pic using the mirror. Then I compared it to my "before" photo taken almost exactly 4 months ago today.
And I cried.
It was the first time I've ever been able to truly see a change. A change that I really could see without chalking it up to "ahh, it may just be my own wishful thinking."
So, I put them together. To share here.
I hear on MFP that people have seen pics of themselves when they were at their heaviest weight and it made them cry. It was their wake up call. I never had that. I've always kinda hated the camera… but I never cried because of how I looked in a photo. Until I saw these two side by side. But they were happy tears.
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
Clothing Issues
FTR (For the record): Last weigh in came in at a 58 pound loss (6 pounds in one week). Doesn't quite make sense… so I'm preparing myself for a "stall" for a couple of weeks.
However… did I mention altering clothes is fast becoming more trouble than it's worth? I think we finally got all of them figured out, so my next trip in to the cleaners should be to pick them up… but sheesh! It's taken forever. It's painfully obvious that she really won't be able to take them in anymore once I lose more. And at best these will probably only give me another 20 pounds. No way they will last for another 50 pounds.
So, today I made a trip to Ross to check out their pants. Just to see if I could make them work. I found one pair of jeans that I thought might be big enough that I decided to try it on and a pair of khakis that I really wasn't sure would work, but I liked them, so it was worth a shot.
Drumroll please… THEY FIT! The jeans fit! Actual normal jeans with a set waist band. That I found at an actual brick and mortar store. And they buttoned up. And I could breathe. And when I took them off, I found I could actually pull them off without unbuttoning them. It was a sweet moment. Unfortunately, they weren't a style that I liked. BUT THEY FIT! The khakis fit too. They were a touch tighter than I normally would have liked, but knowing that the weight is only gonna go down… I decided to get them. They are a little tight, but I can still wear them now. I can sit down and still breathe. And they will only get looser. Having them a little tight means they will last longer. And I've been wanting some nice khaki pants for awhile. I also found a couple of shirts and a skirt that I loved.
However… since finding jeans was a no-go, I then stopped by at Lane Bryant. The largest size they had was actually a size smaller than the one I tried on at Ross. But because those fit so well, I decided it was worth a try… AND THEY FIT TOO! And they had a style that I liked, so I bought a couple of pair. They are, what is referred to as, "skinny jeans" but they don't fit they are painted on, like some skinny jeans I've seen. But because they are of the "skinny jean" style… I think they will last me a little longer too. The coolest part of these jeans is that by sheer number… they are the same size I wore in high school. That may be a vanity sizing thing I'm running into, because I'm not sure I'm quite there yet. Although, to be honest, I really don't know. I know what weight I claimed on my first drivers license, but I never bothered to actually weigh myself so who knows how accurate that wasn't.
But either way… I was so excited about that, I called my sister from the car. I couldn't help it. I can't remember the last time I was able to fit into normal jeans that could be found at an actual store. She asked me what was up. I told her I had to share my exciting news. She asked "how much have you lost now?" (I sent her a pic a week ago of me holding the two shot bags from the previous post.) I told her about the jeans… and that my next goal was to be able share jeans with her (that will be 4 sizes smaller than the ones I just bought). Once I get to that point, the next stop will be to be able share jeans with my oldest sister. And I have no idea what size she wears. But she's only 20 pounds higher than my goal weight…. so that will be HUGE when I get to that point.
Anyway… once at home, I realized as I start bringing more clothes in… I really need to make myself get rid of some. Either by throwing them away or donating them. That was harder than I thought it would be. I still like these clothes! And they are still in good shape. They are just 2 sizes too big now. And some of them literally look like a tent on me. I'm a little nervous to get rid of them until I have stuff to replace them. I think I pulled out one dress, two shirts, and one pair of jeans. The jeans are giving me anxiety. I haven't yet been able to actually put them in the donate bag. The other ones are old enough that I'm okay with getting rid of those.
However… did I mention altering clothes is fast becoming more trouble than it's worth? I think we finally got all of them figured out, so my next trip in to the cleaners should be to pick them up… but sheesh! It's taken forever. It's painfully obvious that she really won't be able to take them in anymore once I lose more. And at best these will probably only give me another 20 pounds. No way they will last for another 50 pounds.
So, today I made a trip to Ross to check out their pants. Just to see if I could make them work. I found one pair of jeans that I thought might be big enough that I decided to try it on and a pair of khakis that I really wasn't sure would work, but I liked them, so it was worth a shot.
Drumroll please… THEY FIT! The jeans fit! Actual normal jeans with a set waist band. That I found at an actual brick and mortar store. And they buttoned up. And I could breathe. And when I took them off, I found I could actually pull them off without unbuttoning them. It was a sweet moment. Unfortunately, they weren't a style that I liked. BUT THEY FIT! The khakis fit too. They were a touch tighter than I normally would have liked, but knowing that the weight is only gonna go down… I decided to get them. They are a little tight, but I can still wear them now. I can sit down and still breathe. And they will only get looser. Having them a little tight means they will last longer. And I've been wanting some nice khaki pants for awhile. I also found a couple of shirts and a skirt that I loved.
However… since finding jeans was a no-go, I then stopped by at Lane Bryant. The largest size they had was actually a size smaller than the one I tried on at Ross. But because those fit so well, I decided it was worth a try… AND THEY FIT TOO! And they had a style that I liked, so I bought a couple of pair. They are, what is referred to as, "skinny jeans" but they don't fit they are painted on, like some skinny jeans I've seen. But because they are of the "skinny jean" style… I think they will last me a little longer too. The coolest part of these jeans is that by sheer number… they are the same size I wore in high school. That may be a vanity sizing thing I'm running into, because I'm not sure I'm quite there yet. Although, to be honest, I really don't know. I know what weight I claimed on my first drivers license, but I never bothered to actually weigh myself so who knows how accurate that wasn't.
But either way… I was so excited about that, I called my sister from the car. I couldn't help it. I can't remember the last time I was able to fit into normal jeans that could be found at an actual store. She asked me what was up. I told her I had to share my exciting news. She asked "how much have you lost now?" (I sent her a pic a week ago of me holding the two shot bags from the previous post.) I told her about the jeans… and that my next goal was to be able share jeans with her (that will be 4 sizes smaller than the ones I just bought). Once I get to that point, the next stop will be to be able share jeans with my oldest sister. And I have no idea what size she wears. But she's only 20 pounds higher than my goal weight…. so that will be HUGE when I get to that point.
Anyway… once at home, I realized as I start bringing more clothes in… I really need to make myself get rid of some. Either by throwing them away or donating them. That was harder than I thought it would be. I still like these clothes! And they are still in good shape. They are just 2 sizes too big now. And some of them literally look like a tent on me. I'm a little nervous to get rid of them until I have stuff to replace them. I think I pulled out one dress, two shirts, and one pair of jeans. The jeans are giving me anxiety. I haven't yet been able to actually put them in the donate bag. The other ones are old enough that I'm okay with getting rid of those.
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